Thursday, April 21, 2011

M.I.A.

Holy hell. Has it really been four MONTHS since I’ve updated?? Did you all think I was dead?!? I feel horribly guilty for neglecting what I worked so hard on, but I had the worst case of writer’s block ever. It wasn’t that I didn’t have anything to talk about, it was just that I didn’t have anything I wanted to talk about on here.

Around Christmastime, ex-DH (I really need to think of a new name for him now) mentioned some things I’d written about. He said he hadn’t read it himself – which I believe, he always thought I talked too much so why would he want to read my babble?? – but that somebody he knew had told him I was embarrassing the kids and talking shit about him. It was enough to make me want to give up the blog. I felt violated, not by him, but by whoever read this and decided to use it against me. I wanted to write but I felt censored. I write because I love it and I want you all to read because it entertains you, not because you want to use it as ammunition to stir up trouble between me and my ex. I thought about starting a new blog. Shutting this one down, deleting everything, moving on and being completely anonymous. I thought about it a lot actually. What I would call it, how I would have the time to put the work into getting followers like I did last year. It exhausted me to think about it. So instead I just let my blog I worked so hard on sit here for four months. I know it isn’t the best reasoning but I needed the time. A lot has happened in the months that I’ve been gone and I really truly honest-to-God promise I will write about it all very very soon. For right now, I just wanted to say hi, for those that haven’t given up on me and mourned my bloggy death of course…..