Tuesday, March 30, 2010

This and that

Okay, so the mobile upload was a success. Yay! Isn't that a handy little tool? Probably won't do anything to help the arthritic thumb I swear years of texting has given me though. I think I've brought this up before, but I often wonder if I could sue my cell phone company for the aforementioned text-induced thumb injury...? My thinking is if that one lady famously won millions against McDonald's for being an idiot and spilling coffee on herself, why couldn't I get some monetary compensation for my jacked up thumb? I won't ever do that of course, but mark my words, someday somebody will walk away a millionaire from a suit like that. Watch your back, Verizon!

Bug is still working on crawling. Right now he gets up on all four's, rocks back and forth, and then lunges for whatever it is he's trying to get. Like a puma or something. It's cute, although I know it's only a matter of time before he'll have it figured out and I'll be baby proofing everything. One downer about living in a tri-level is the amount of baby gates I'm going to need. Those things are ridiculously expensive! $50 for a damn gate? Maybe I should just get a leash and tether... joking of course. Don't report me.

Speaking of our house (kind of), we got our new bathtub and surround installed yesterday. The caulk wasn't dry enough for me to enjoy it last night so I am salivating at the prospect of lounging in that tub tonight. I swear it's so deep, I need floaties. Nut was soooo excited when they brought the new tub in - clapping, shouting, "Yay!!!" - until she got up from nap and saw the old tub was gone. She immediately threw herself to the ground and started wailing, "Noooo!!! My bath! My bath!" I guess she had more of an emotional attachement to the POS than I thought. Tonight's bath time should be interesting. She has this weird thing about foreign bathtubs, FREAKS OUT in fact, so I'm sure I'm in for it. I may have to get in with her tonight to ease her fears. Or maybe that's just an excuse for me to get in a warm bath twice...
Testing, testing.... Mobile uploads. Fingers crossed for success!

Friday, March 26, 2010

The best cure for whine is wine

It has been another One of Those Days today. Nut fought sleep last night and was still up at midnight singing about choo-choo's. My hatred for Thomas the Tank Engine makes me blame him. I was hopeful she'd sleep in today, but no. She was up at 6:30 before my alarm had even gone off. And yeah, she's in about as good a mood as you would think. Bug is about as pleasant today also. He is trying his damnedest to crawl on all four's, but all he is succeeding in doing is pissing himself off. He gets up, rocks back and forth... and then goes backwards. And then cries about it. It has been one hissy fit after another all afternoon so aside from his brief nap, I've been listening to him and his tearless cry for about three hours. It got old after five minutes. To top it all off, I caught a plague from one of the three kids that had the sniffles and had to go to the doctor this morning. It's just a sinus infection, but wouldn't you know tonight is my much-anticipated night out? My MIL is keeping the kids overnight and I'm supposed to go out to see a band with a few friends. I'm going come hell or high water, but I guess I just won't be able to taste my beer. That may not be a bad thing though, I guess I could drink the nasty cheap crap and not know the difference. Natty Light? Why yes, I think I will. Can't taste it anyways. And with that, I better get going. Bug is trying to use Mo as a launching pad to push off of and instead just rammed his toe in the dog's arse. I need to disinfect his foot now....

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Picture Post

A glimpse into what I go through every afternoon when Nut is in one of her anti-nap moods:

EVERY afternoon. It makes me tired just to look at it. How it doesn't exhaust her is beyond me.

(Wo)man's Best Friend

You would look at my life and think I'm pretty busy. I have a 2 year old, a 7 month old, and babysit an 11 month old and almost-3 year old. I am on my feet most of the day - exception being the blissful two hours when the kids nap - and generally run around like a chicken with my head cut off. You'd think I wouldn't need to add any more excitement around my house. You'd think. Yet.... we got a puppy. I know, I know, I've heard it. What the hell was I thinking? And to tell you the truth, I don't know. If I was going to get anything it should have been a maid. Or a nanny. Or both. But yet, we got a dog. I should probably have my head examined. Honestly though, we lucked out. He's a GREAT dog. Potty trained, which is more than I can say for my daughter. Half border collie, half beagle so he won't be too big, but not small enough to fit in a purse and be annoying. We adopted him from the Animal Protective League so I consider it my good deed for the week. He is 3 months old and was being fostered at a home with a 4 year old child so at least he's used to kids. So blogging world, meet Mo:

Thursday, March 18, 2010

March'in Right Along

How is March almost over?? I turned 27 and it's like somebody hit the fast forward button. I'm going to wake up one morning and be 30, I swear. I was looking at a picture taken the other night during my brief venture out for drinks and dah-yum! I look old. Or maybe the friend in the picture just looked young. Either way, yikes.

Tonight I have to go to work. To be quite honest, I have no desire to go hang shirts up for three hours, but it's the only time I get away so I guess beggars can't be choosers in this situation. What I'd really like to do is sneak away someplace quiet with a cup of coffee and my laptop and WRITE. And write and write and write. I have so much going on in my head right now that I want to get out on paper (or Microsoft Word rather) before I forget it, but every time I open up something I've been working on, mama duty calls. The next great American novel could be completely wasted by too many diaper changes...... Well, not really. I don't expect chick-fic, as much as I absolutely adore it, to be considered a great American novel any time soon. It sounded much more dramatic when I phrased it that way though.

In case it's not obvious, this is a completely random entry today, but whatev. I'm in one of those moods. I've decided to start labeling my posts. Only problem is, I don't really know what to label them. Oh and I don't quite know what that will do, other than make my blog pop up on a search if someone types in say... baby poop or something. It feels weird to put my blog "out there", so to speak, but I feel having one of these is nothing if not self-indulgent, so why not admit that I hope I get followers? There. I said it. Tell your friends. I want followers!

Bug keeps dive bombing off the couch. It's becoming mildly concerning. I say mildly because I don't leave him up there unattended and have thus far, successfully caught him almost every time. Almost. There was twice I missed. Oops, bad mom. He is starting to low crawl, which is pretty exciting to the both of us. I know once he really gets the hang of it, he is going to be all over the place. When he's trying to low crawl, he gets those little legs going so fast, it looks like he's carpet swimming. I'm sure Nut will be pissed once he starts getting more mobile. They're already starting to fight over toys, God help me. There always seems to be a war over Thomas trains. Stupid effing Thomas. One more reason for me not to like that blue bastard and his equally annoying friends. Nut gets so OUTRAGED that the baby dare take one of her precious, overpriced, die cast metal engines, she emits the loudest, shrillest shriek I have ever had the displeasure of subjecting my ear drums too. I swear to God, she sounds like a pissed off chimpanzee. You know the sound..... Now imagine hearing it twenty times a day..... Now you know why I like my wine.

Well the time has come - i.e. nap time for the kiddos - for me to wash my hair so I'm ready for work tonight. If you lasted through all that blabbering, wow. Pat yourself on the back. A for the day.

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Naptime Meltdown

Please excuse me while I scream. I need to vent and this is my only outlet.


Ahem, I feel a bit better. My kids are trying me today. And when I say trying, I mean their goal is to drive me fucking insane. And it's working. Bug won't nap, but is so tired he's done nothing but fuss and whine for the last hour and a half. I finally gave up and put him down on the couch with his pillow and blankie and instead of giving in to his drooping eyes, he keeps fighting it and trying to divebomb off the couch head first. Nut isn't doing any better with nap time, I swear to God, I'm about to rip my hair out from her. So far in the last 2.5 hours (yeah, that's how long we've been going around and around today), she has taken every toy out of her toybox, dumped her hamper, threw her entire laundry basket of clean clothes around the room, pulled shit out of her dresser, took all the plastic bins out of her cubby (after dumping them of course), and - my personal fave here - gotten ahold of a marker and colored all over her fecking wall, bedroom carpet, outfit, and baby gate. I asked her where she got a marker from (I hide them and they are only used under supervision) and she leads me to her sock drawer where she's stashed all kind of crap: Chuck E. Cheese tokens, a necklace of mine, Scotch Tape, three markers, and a screwdriver. WTF? She has bags under her eyes, is grumpy as can be, but is still upstairs raking havoc. I need to pick up and sanitize the toys, get my kitchen cleaned up, and quite frankly, put on a damn bra. Bug puked down my shirt earlier so I ran down to the laundry room to change only for the doorbell to ring ten seconds earlier. I didn't have any clean ones in the dryer so I answered my door (to keep from the bell ringing again and waking the kiddos I babysit)and talked to an AT&T salesman for ten minutes in a smelly shirt while my girls hung free. And it was kind of cold. *sigh* It has been One of Those Days. Capital letters intended. Thank God it also coincidentally Wine Night, which is a great remedy for One of Those Days.

Sunday, March 14, 2010

Last Call

So Thursday night after I had put in my weekly three hours of retail slavery, I was - gasp! shock! stop the presses! - supposed to meet up with a few friends for a couple drinks at a going away party. No big deal, right? I should have known that could (and would) never be the case. To start off my evening, DH and I were in a spat. I left for work pissed off, stewed about it even more while there, and then after another heated exchange on the phone while en route downtown, well... you add alcohol to that mix and see what happens. I also uttered the phrase, "I won't be home too late." Why I said that, I don't know. I NEVER go out, never do anything without at least one of the kids with me, so why did I open my mouth and speak those words? He knew it probably wasn't true, I knew it probably wasn't true, so why did I say it? To make a long story short, shots were purchased, shots were drank (I wasn't gonna say no, they cost money!), and I wound up a hot mess. Luckily since my tolerance is pretty low (I was buzzed one beer in), I didn't have a hangover, but I will say my brain hurt for most of the next day. I think it's official though: I can't hang anymore. My young, cool, partyin' days are over and gone. While I had a blast, I was much happier to sit home yesterday and read a book than I was to go out for St. Patty's like my friends did. How did I get so old so quickly? I used to be able to drink people under the table, want to be out every night, and go on two hours of sleep the next day. How quickly the mighty fall. Ah well. It was nice to be Nic for a few hours, not Mommy, but I'm still stickin' with the latter.

Wednesday, March 10, 2010


Is that a word? I don't think so, but it is now. I'm adding it to the Nictionary. But oh wait - I just Googled it and it is in fact, a word. At least according to allwords.com:


The state of being random

Funny that in posting the definition of randomosity, I am exhibiting such an act. Hmmmm...

Keeping in line with the randomness, here's what's been going on in my neck of the woods:

Bug is halfway through Carrot Week and so far so good. That brings him up to a total of five different foods: Oatmeal, Squash, Prunes, Applesauce, and Carrots. Variety is not the spice of his life obviously. Yet.

The kids both had pictures taken this week. Monday evening Bug went for his 6 month pics; yesterday morning it was Nut's turn for her 2 year. After the last two picture fiascos, I decided there was no way in hell I was taking them together. I am SO happy to report that it went well and they turned out really cute! We use Target's Portrait Studio so of course I had to treat myself to a coffee at the in-store Starbucks before going. Something happened Monday evening there that made me question America's youth. I ordered a decaf skinny vanilla latte. Less than two minutes later the "barista" (I use that term loosely, you'll see why in a moment) hands me a cup that looks suspiciously like milk poured over ice. When I questioned where the coffee was, she looks at me blankly and replies, "But I thought you wanted decaf." sigh. I paused for a moment, because she HAD to be kidding, right?? Wrong. I told her yes, I did want decaf - decaf COFFEE. Why would I pay $4 for vanilla milk?The poor girl looked so damn confused. She consulted a recipe book, but still had to call for someone to come help. By that point, I had very little faith in the outcome of my drink - and rightfully so. It was burnt. I was late for Bug's appointment by then so I just said screw it and left. But seriously. Wow.

I had more to write, but I typed a looooong post earlier and Nut pressed some button and poof! it all went. Now everyone is waking up from naps so diaper duty is calling.

Thursday, March 4, 2010

That's not candy

Yesterday afternoon while the kids were napping, I decided to finish up the laundry. Since I was downstairs, I didn't hear Nut get up. She's very quiet when she wants to be - which is usually when she's up to something and not when I want her to be quiet, say like when her brother is trying to sleep. Imagine my surprise as I come upstairs with Bug's laundry to find that Nut has busted out of her room (she's figured out just the right way to body slam the gate and knock it down). She's not in her room, she's not in the baby's room, she's not in my room... last place to check is the bathroom. I walk in and there she is. Surrounded by unwrapped tampons. I scared the crap out of her when I walked into the room but once she'd recovered, she held one up and proudly said, "sucker!!". Uh, not quite. I guess since they were in a wrapper she thought it was candy and once she saw the stick, well, in her mind the logical conclusion was a sucker. I dont' know if she actually put one in her mouth, but for my own germaphobeness, I'm going to say no. Into the trash they all went though. A week into the so-called terrible two's and it just keeps getting more...... interesting. To say the least of course.

Monday, March 1, 2010

One person's job is another mother's nightmare

A while back someone told me "you're too smart to be a stay at home mom." It is not the first time I have been told this. I know it is meant to be a compliment, but each time somebody says that to me, it nags at the back of my mind. What is the stigma associated with being a SAHM? I know it's not for everyone but it doesn't make me less of a person. I had a job and since we were finacially able, I made the choice to quit and stay home with my kids instead. They drive me nuts, yes, but I wouldn't trade it for the world. I LOVE being here to see every milestone, to spend more than a few hours with them on the weekdays, I LOVE that I am lucky enough to do so. A lot aren't. My mom worked and I turned out just fine, but my situation is different than hers was. Most days, I do more being here than I ever did when I went to an actual workplace. I am a cook, I am a maid, I am an errand runner, a teacher, a comforter, someone expected to set examples, do the laundry, shower the kids with love, grocery shop, follow a routine, basically be everything for everyone. Mothers keep the house running. I don't feel as though I'm wasting any potential. I'm good at what I do. Perhaps I put my plans on hold some to raise Bug and Nut, but it is well worth it. I don't want to be pitied or looked down upon, just as I don't pity or look down upon mothers who do go to work.

*sigh* Okay, I think the rant is over now.